During the 9 months of pregnancy, I prepared for childbirth. I attended perinatal education courses for parents, practiced yoga, joined breastfeeding groups before my baby was born, read books, and rested.
And then came that significant day when we met Renzo. The birth went well, and we were together after he was born. It didn’t go as planned, but looking back, it was the best thing that happened to us, and that’s okay. What I wasn’t prepared for was the postpartum period. I did have a kind of mini support network with resources, but something was missing. For a long time, I felt alone, misunderstood, stressed, anxious, and especially anxious. I kept it to myself for a long time, not sharing it with anyone, until almost 9 months later (or perhaps coinciding with the end of the exterogestation period), I told my partner that I needed help.
That’s when I joined a mindfulness course. Dalida, my teacher, guided me to put into words everything I felt, to allow myself to be, to express, cry, laugh, and open up. I understood the importance of having a space just for myself, someone who would listen without judgment, who would allow me to feel what I was feeling without trying to fix it or say, “But your baby and you are fine, and you had a beautiful birth, why are you feeling this way?” Now, at the end of my second postpartum journey, I reaffirm that need for support, validation, and accompaniment.
I always remember the magic of sharing the journey with a doula. It’s unique. I am infinitely grateful to my doula, Amy, who accompanied me during Elu’s pregnancy, birth, and postpartum period. I also recall my doula training at Andou, and how I felt “doula-ed” by all my colleagues during Elu’s gestation. I can’t find words to describe the support from Amy, what she helped us with, simply by being present. Sometimes the work of doulas is just that, providing a space where the mother can connect with her baby, and they instinctively know what to do. In Psych-K, I learned that we must create and maintain a sacred space. Holding what the Inuit tribe calls “Isumataq,” the guardian of that sacred space where truth is revealed. I feel that the doula’s work is there, being the guardian of childbirth, of motherhood, that sacred space where the truth and magic between mother and baby are unveiled. For each family, it will be different, sometimes more present, sometimes more distant, sometimes with cuddles and caresses, sometimes with a “you are doing great,” sometimes with a supportive silent gaze. That’s how it was for us. Thank you, Amy, for holding “Isumataq” for us. We will always remember all the love Amy, my doula colleagues, and those magical friends who are always there to doula you without being a doula, but with the soul of an unconditional companion that fills any heart they touch. I hope to touch the souls of many women in that way in the future, just as all of you touched mine.
So, today, I am a postpartum doula, and I want to accompany you in connecting with yourself and your baby. If you feel that this resonates with who you are or how you want to experience motherhood, write to me!
